The New Old Biddy Hearts Chris March!

I would like to thank bookstores across NYC for helping (enabling) me to meet (stalk) my favorite Project Runway peeps!  HOORAY!  Last night I put on my best windbreaker hoodie to go to Borders to meet Chris March from Season 4 of Project Runway.

"You can hear my laugh even when I am just a picture."

I got to Borders early in my biddy fashion (because you never know when a train may be late!) and saw the man of the hour briefly chatting with Borders' employees at the front of the store before being ushered away from the hoi polloi.  I saw that there was a table set up at the front of the store which was unlike the other events I've attended.  "Oh sadness," I thought, "Is there no discussion and laughter?"  I walked up to the "greeter/security guard" who was planted at the front of the store.  His wan expression let me know he did not want to talk as he was very busy guarding a pile of Kitty Kelly's newest book of complete make-'em-ups, Oprah.  (PS- the book is already 30% off.  HAHAHAA!  Take that, Kitty Kelly!  Perhaps if you wrote for Scientology your fables would actually sell.  Too soon?)  Without making eye contact the greeter/security guard let me know that Chris would be signing books at the front of the store only.  Aw, crud.  Oh well, better than nothing, right?

After buying my book I met up with fellow Project Runway fan (stalker), Lauren, who I met at Laura Bennett's book signing a few weeks back.  Lauren was also wearing a hoodie.  (Ergo, we will obviously be friends forever.)  We hung out waiting for 7pm to roll around and we got in line.  Okay, we WERE the line at that point.  Just us.  Two ladies in hoodies desperately grasping our cameras.  (PS - My look was complemented with a summer scarf in lime green and a dippy smile that even a 4-year-old would deem as "uncool.")

3 more people got in line behind us and Chris March was escorted to his table.  Chris' disappointment was palpable.  I can't blame him.  I'd be sad too if I came out and saw me.  At that point I wanted to run over an hug him and say: "Quality over quantity, Chris!" (But I didn't, no restraining orders today!)

Lauren got her picture taken first...

...and then me.  (Thank GOODNESS my head looks normal in this.  To better understand this reference, see my Tim Gunn post. from a month ago.. oy.)

We chatted with Chris and he is truly as delightful in person as he was on TV.  We talked about reality television and its "merits."  I told him that I understood the ruse of reality as I worked for the "reality" show elimiDATE for 4 (horribly awful hideously long) years.  He burst out, "ELIMIDATE?!" he gave me his condolences for having worked on that show.  (Note: I'm still in therapy.)  I also let him know how much I love his design aesthetic and that I love that he self-published his book.  SELF- PUBLISHED, PEOPLE.  This is not an easy feat.  Nay.  This means you do and finance everything yourself.  Not a small task!  He mentioned that he's blogging now, to which I said, "I know!  Keep it up!"

At that point, another Chris March fan arrived, Laura Bennett!

  

Looking completely hip and casual in jeans and a Chanel jacket, Laura came by to support her fellow PR alum/author.  (Sidenote: A Borders employee brought up some of Laura's books to the front table as the folks in line didn't know she had a signing just over a week ago.  Somebody give that employee a raise!)  She told Chris that her kids are big fans, to which Chris exclaimed, "Are they gay?"  Laura shrugged, "One maybe."  

More people started to show up for Chris (GOOD!) so Laura, Lauren and I huddled up and discussed the merits of Glee and why Finn can't sing.  This conversation took at least 20 minutes as we all had a lot to say about this matter.  A LOT.  

Then Laura got to see a bit of my biddiness first hand much to my chagrin.  I handed her a pen, but it was empty.  "Empty" as in the ink thingy fell out and all that was left was a sad pink plastic shell.  So I handed her another one.  Also empty.  Yep.  You know you're a new old biddy when you carry empty pen corpses around with you in your purse next to your green tea mints.  (And I'll have you know, the pen carcasses are still in my purse lest I find their insides floating around somewhere.  Waste not want not!)  Sigh.....

All in all, a great evening.  I hope Chris had a good time despite a small turnout.  And btw, I love Chris' book and so should you!  It's a coffee table book with pictures from his costumes/designs over the years including Project Runway.  (Meryl Streep's dresses are not in the book as I believe it went to print before those were debuted...)  You can find I Heart Chris March here on his website.  And DO check out his blog as well.  Do it and support self-published authors!

PS - On my way home I had a random star sighting, the dad from Ugly Betty, Tony Plana.  But to me, he'll always be Jefe from The Three Amigos.  The jackass in me wanted to ask him if he knew what a plethora was yet, but again thought it best to avoid a restraining order and stay 0 for 2 for the evening....

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For other Project Runway related features,

 read about how I met Tim Gunn & Laura Bennett!

And relive the silliness that Season 6 models 

Kojii, Katie, Fatma and I had during Assignment: Jennifer! 

The New Old Biddy Meets the Glamorous Laura Bennett!

Again, like the Tim Gunn book signing I attended just over a week ago, it started with a tweet: Laura Bennett from Season 3 of Project Runway was signing her new book, Didn't I Feed You Yesterday?  A Mother's Guide to Sanity in Stilettos at Borders on Wednesday, April 7th!  SQUEEEEE!

This time I was alone, thanks to the fact that my partner in Project Runway crime, Joanna, has her in-laws arriving today and she had to stay home to cook.  WHATEVER.  PRIORITIES, LADY!  (I kid!  Marginally...)  I fretted about what to wear.  Laura is basically the female version of Tim Gunn when it comes to poise, sophistication and elegance.  So I wore a hoodie.  You know, cuz an age-inappropriate gray hoodie from Forever 21 totes says: "style and elegance" and "I'm a confident woman in my 30's who is definitely not having any anxiety over her age at all-- SHUT UP I AM NOT!"  

I digress...

I got there at 6:30, bought my book and sat in a sea of EMPTY CHAIRS.  What the hell, NYC?  This was the same scenario at the Tim Gunn signing.  Everybody shows up at 6:55 and then wonders why they didn't get a seat, but that dork in the age-inappropriate hoodie is front and center in the second row.  It's called a watch, people.  Buy one.  (Or hit a button on your cell phone to show the time.  Either way, just don't act surprised when you don't get a seat.)

I think the best part about the book signing was that Laura's entire family was there (except the 3-year-old, Finn, because he likes to pull books off shelves and even a flippant mom like Laura determined, "This is not the proper venue for him").  HER KIDS ARE AMAZING.  First of all, they are all firecrackers.  Hams.  Comedians.  These are children who are not shy and are ready to take on the world.  (Kinda like their mom, perhaps?)  Before the event started, her 5-year-old, Larson, was quizzing the representative from Random House about her job and WHY they would name their company "Random House."  She did a good job with her answers and Larson seemed satisfied.  Then Peik, Truman and Pierson all arrived.  The excitement they had for the event and their mom was palpable.  These kids were on top of the world.  I couldn't help but smile, I like when kids are proud of their parents. (Or they had a grand plan to embarrass her.  Either way, they were happy.)

Finally Laura Bennett arrives looking super chic in a gray flannel shift dress with a sunburst of jewels around the waist.  (And yes, she made it herself.)  Her hair was cut in the cutest pixie cut in her signature (Loreal) red color.  (And BTW, my friend, Christina, alerted me to the fact that Laura cuts her own hair - is there anything this woman can not do??)  She began the evening by reading the intro: "Prepare for Take-off."  It was awesome to hear her start the book off as now her voice will stay with me as I read the rest.

The Q&A was ... hilarious!  Her kids asked tons of questions like the very important one, "Who's your favorite son?"  Laura had her reply for who the favorite was for today and who she's penciling in for the rest of the week.  She told us that what she misses about fashion now that she's a designer is the actual construction of making the garment.  That's her favorite part and it's been taken away!  She also told us that for her final collection at Bryant Park, she had a whole color story (red) that didn't make the runway.  People, she made a million WELL made garments in two months, while pregnant and raising 5 kids.  (I immediately felt lazy.  All I had accomplished yesterday was making a grilled cheese sandwich and getting my butt out the door.  Sigh...)

She thanked all the people in her life, kids, friends, agents and professionals in her life who helped make the book possible.  Then she told her husband that she'd thank him later, which she punctuated with, "Don't worry, we'll be careful.  We have 6 already."

Book signing time!  At this point we lined up and her kids were up on stage next to her signing bookmarks.  Truman, however, was making his way through the line, making sure everybody knew his name.  When I told him I knew his name already, he moved along saying, "She already knows!"  

Time to meet Laura!

Peik, (pronounced Pake, like "bake") is in the pic with us.  (You need to get the book to hear the hilarious stories about how she and her husband, Peter, came up with their kids' names.)  I also got signed bookmarks from her sons Pierson and I think the other was from Larson, but the signature looks like: "6ore."  (Maybe she has a kid she doesn't know about?  It's possible....)

And just like Tim, her reaction to "The New Old Biddy" is priceless: "Um, okay, this is a first," she stated as she spelled my moniker out slowly so as to not make any errors.  I told her that it was my Twitter name and blogging name.  I'm pretty sure that only made me see (more) crazy than I already appeared.  Sigh.  Someday I'll make a good impression.  Maybe in 2014 or so.

Overall, wonderful evening.  Even met another Project Runway fan and chatted about the crap-tastic season going on right now.  I love meeting other stalkers--um, cough cough--enthusiasts.  It lets me know that I'm not alone.  (Except when I go to bed at night, but that's a different and sadder blog...)

On April 19th, Chris March will be signing his book!  At least I have 9 days to pick out a proper hoodie this time around... I'm thinking pink!

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For an excerpt of Laura's book, click here!

And when Laura isn't writing, designing or running her brood around town, she tweets!